the other mother - free writing workshop for moms

Summer Reading (why we write)

 

 

On deeply green and often boring summer vacations (boring isn't a four-letter word, really) in Greensboro, Vermont, the highlight of trips to town was the tiny, well-stocked public library. It was packed with possibilities. Someone should have opened a beautiful indie bookstore in Greensboro, at least for the summer, because moms and dads sat in the car during early morning goosebump swim lessons and no one had cell phones or kindles. But I remember the smell of the place, the vanilla and dust of books, checked out and brought to the lake, checked out and left on plaid couches, checked out and read through night and into morning.

This morning I met a Manhattan police woman, coming home after a night shift. She watched me pick up my book to read and said, "that's what I want to do when I retire: read." It'll be one long summer vacation, finding friends in fiction, finding something to ponder with friends in real life. I thanked her for working all night--so we felt safe reading in bed.

So here's your topic: Write a memory of summer reading. Is reading why you love to write? What did you find and read in summer libraries, in rental homes, in your grandmother's basement?

And also: what's on your summer reading list? Here's mine so far--because I want to read, read, read as if I were waiting until after rain to check the crayfish traps and swim out to the big rock.

Jane Smiley's Private Lives,

Lake Shore Limited by Sue Miller,

Keeper--a Kathi Appelt YA,

You and Juki, my new serger manual,

B is for Bad Poetry but Pamela August Russell.

That's just the stack by the desk. There are a thousand more in the bedroom, in the library, in my shopping cart.

Also, I hope you'll read THE ORPHAN SISTER, which is coming out July 5th. You can buy it at your local bookstore, or at Amazon, or Powell's online or download it to your kindle or nook. Please do honor me with your read--and let me know what you think. (I believe, this week, if you navigate your way to Goodreads, you can get an advance FREE copy! Also check out Manic Mommy's post--she's giving them away, too, and many other fabulous books!)

Oh, and if you're in northern NJ on July 13, come to Bookends in Ridgewood for a free writing workshop and signing at 7pm. Or Barnes and Noble on Route 17S in Paramus at 730 for a signing and reading--I'm bringing chocolate.

You've Got to Have Fight

 

Which is not to say that writing is about fighting--although if you ask some of my students there's a battle with the fingers and the page and the brain--but today's topic is one I used recently in workshop, and I was so thrilled to have everyone's characters gain sudden depth and speak to us right there in a snow-crusted Starbucks while cellphones buzzed with urgencies and the police politely reminded people that icebanks atop their cars could turn into deadly weapons (I kid you not, and I thank them; a school secretary's husband was killed by a truck iceberg last year).

Anyway, since digression is one of my favorite things, I will break up this topic for you so you can follow along. Don't cheat.

1) pick two characters. If you're not working on something right this minute, pick a real person and make up a character. Write (or type) their names on the top of the page.

2) Pick a conflict. Commit. I know you might think, oh, I have plenty in mind, but just pick one, and write it down.  Maybe it's a husband who wants to move to Yugoslavia and a wife who wants to stay in the Bronx. Maybe it's two sisters fighting over a shirt, some amazing boots, the only food in the house, a boy, or whose turn it is to call for an intervention.

3) Got both those things written down? Really, write them down first. I'll give you the next step next, after you write them down...

4) Write a dialogue between these characters, about this conflict. Choose first person (I said, for one character) or close third (she said; he said). Write this dialogue for 14 minutes or four pages, whichever comes first. Don't forget to just write.

5) go back to your dialogue (don't read this until you've written!) and add at least two beats (the spaces between dialogue in which the characters adjust their bra straps, or tip their chairs back, or think the opposite of what they're saying). Now add one more, making sure it gives some important sensory information, ie, She smelled like smoke, I thought, bitter and ruined.

 

Then post it all here in the comments, so we can be proud of you. Conflict and dialogue both, by nature, move a plot along. And with dialogue we hear your characters speaking, and they can think things they do not speak, and do things with their bodies (stepping backward, poking each other with pencils) that tell us even more. Can't wait to read you here!

 

Guess what? My new novel, THE ORPHAN SISTER, is coming in July 2011.

Make Your Own Summer Camp

I know it's been a long time since I've posted, but you're still visiting, writing, and emailing. Thank you! When I'm between novels, I always return to writing practice--I hope you'll come back and try every topic I've recommended.

Meanwhile, the peonies have dropped their heavy petals and the wax begonias are sunbathing. My son just came home with a fat file full of finished work--and we're labeling, signing forms, planning for a summer of daycamps and new pursuits.

I try to think of summer not just as a time to shuttle from drop off to pickup to the much-politicized local natural pool, but also a time to try new things. Sometimes it's best to sit outside and write, even if my pen gets sap-stuck and I can't bring my laptop for glare. I'm remembering my own summers: Bread and Puppet Circus, working at a dairy farm, a stable, science camp and deep, creative boredom on summer trips to Vermont.

It's your turn to stop and taste the green shoots of the timothy grass. Here's your topic:

Write about your summer when you were ten.

Or another:

Write about the summer you wished you had.

Then give yourself the freedom to change your routine--the kids are at daycamp, so put your feet in the kiddie pool and write about something new. Or try something new: try watercolor painting, read nonfiction if you love novels, read a poem outloud to your child, your spouse, your grandmother over the phone. Make a list of things you don't get to all school year, and give yourself an hour each morning--maybe for a week, maybe all summer if you can. Major in the flexible mind.

What's Beneath the Leaves

We just went for a walk in the lovely, lovely leaves. My daughter, who for some reason is sweetest of all, got stung not once, but twice by wasps. Are some of us really sweeter than others?

All this drama reminded me that I hadn’t posted for a while...

So here’s a writing topic that worked wonderfully in class:

Write about needles. Pine, pins and, dentists (ugh), sewing, knitting, being needled—whatever comes first to mind.

Write for 11 minutes.

Don’t be afraid to go there, even if it hurts (clearly this writing exercise can vaccinate you against fall gloom).

Post your writing in the comments section below (for any newbies who don’t already know). In class, the writings had a remarkable connection to each other—it charged the class with ideas and interest, and no one got hurt.

In other news, if you’re in northern NJ and would like to come meet me in person, come to the Ramsey Public Library in Ramsey, New Jersey on Sunday, November 16th at 2pm. Here are driving directions to the library.

The event is free, and I’m hoping for some of the amazing questions I’ve had at book groups lately.

Come! Tell me you read the blog!

And, as always, I’d be happy to sign bookplates if any of you would like to get your holiday shopping wrapped up early with signed copies of The Other Mother. Just send me an email with your name, address, and what you’d like me to write. I’ve been sending them out by the dozen, and it feels great to know more people will be reading about Thea and Amanda and hopefully feeling just a little more compassionate toward other mothers everywhere.

Oh, Italia!

ravioli gnudi burro salviac parmigiano
image credit: trozbo : cc-2.0-nc-sa

I've never been to Italy, but I was recently invited to a fantastic event hosted by Kim Orlando of Traveling Mom.com, Beth Feldman of RoleMommy.com, and Andrea Sertoli at Select Italy, his Soho loft/cooking school. First, let me say it was like entering a geode; from Bowery and a nondescript entryway and elevator to an open-armed loft filled with lovely company, extraordinary good will and hospitality, a vast square table that seated about 30 of us, and exquisite food.

I learned to make a little edible cheese basket for salads (we all did; some of the women writers dancing more fervently than others to cool the cheese/polenta mixture in the pan), red snapper baked in foil, and the adorably-named gnudi, pasta sans pasta--just the filling (oh, the filling!) piped out of pastry sleeves, then boiled, then baked.

Yum! Yum! Not just the food, but the conversation. I knew one woman there when I arrived (though it turns out I knew some from cyberspace...or they knew me, and then meeting them in all three dimensions was a joy), and a whole roomful when I left.

I wish I was having a catered affair so I could hire the charming Andrea Tiberi (it was a night of several Andreas), but if you live in the Tri-state area, I highly recommend that you do. I was also very tempted by all the Select Italy tours--making frescos with your family! Driving a Ferrari on the Italian roads! (okay, maybe not that one, though it looked scenic) Hiking in the Italian Alps! Definitely on my someday to do list.

Meanwhile...

This week's writing topic: Write about a place you've never been. Write for twenty minutes. As a bonus topic, make a list of trips you've taken--disastrous, fabulous, enchanting, nauseating...choose one to write about for another twenty.

And if you feel like sharing, that is, about a nonfictional trip, go visit Traveling Mom. You might just publish an essay with her, and inspire (or warn!) the rest of us. Happy Spring, writers on and all!

Heartland, NJ

Did you vote? did ya, did ya? Don't forget to vote when it comes around again, okay?

I'm listening to the new Jack Johnson cd, looking out at the crystal chandelier of naked rained upon dogwood and Japanese maple.

And thinking of all of you, so here's a new topic: Write about the last time you said goodbye.

And just to show I'm not all blues (I'm not, really), send someone a valentine, someone who might not get one otherwise, someone who isn't expecting that sweet cheek-kiss of elementary school wish fulfillment.

XOXO!

I owe some comments,

but fresh from a mom writers panel event at the White Plains Library with Jane Green, Pamela Dorman, and Role Mommy Beth Feldman (if you were there, thank you for coming, and for the fabulous questions!) I wanted to offer up a fresh topic.

I've been thinking about wishes, about how they change over time, about how close they can be to prayer, how selfish, how light.

So here's your writing topic. Take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. Using your dominant hand (say, right if you're a righty) make a list of wishes on the corresponding (in this case right) side.

Then put the pen in your nondominant hand and write on the other side. Make a list of secret wishes. This could be in code if it's easier to admit to them that way (of course, they can all belong to a character anyway!).

Now choose one wish from each column and start to write. Don't forget the sounds, textures, taste of it all. Write for nine minutes.

I hope your wishes smell like just peeled oranges.

3 Tips for ankle surgery recovery

Hello, hello! I feel like I've been away forever. On the plus side, I have a new talar dome (well, slightly used, but still) and I can now lurch around in a delightful and only sometimes painful manner. Actually, that's pretty much the whole minus of it, too.

Thank you all for the well-wishes -- and hope your holidays were full of festivity, joy, and kindness. Oh, and writing. But if you haven't written yet, I'll give you a topic at the end of this post.

Some great news about The Other Mother: A Novel. New Jersey Star-Ledger columnist Maureen Berzok has listed The Other Mother as one of the Best Jersey Books of 2007, sharing the honors with:

• The Last Three Miles: Politics, Murder, and the Construction of America's First Superhighway by Steven Hart,
• The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz,
• and Exit Ghost by Philip Roth.

Wahoo!!! Thank you Ms. Berzok, for placing me in such esteemed company.

The Other Mother is also one of Role Mommy's favorite books of 2007. If you're near White Plains, NY on January 23rd, you can come to the White Plains Public Library to meet me, as well as Pamela Dorman and Jane Green, at the Role Mommy Books and Authors We Love event. I can't wait! I might even been lurching a bit more smoothly by then!

So, here are the three tips for ankle surgery recovery as promised:

1. Become completely obsessed with knitting.

I'll try to post some pictures. I've made 3 hats, 6 scarves, two cable couture bags. Let's just say knitting keeps me thinking about things other than pain, and it feels productive, even if, as my husband pointed out, my kids look like people whose mother has a little too much yarn on her hands.

Check out Loopsknitting. Shelley has a gorgeous store, gorgeous site, and Loops Scoop, with free patterns and ideas; I won a kit for the cable couture bag, which is what got me back on the knitwagon...), a sweater, several purses to felt (once I can get down to the laundry again), a wrap, two stuffed animals...I'm done bragging.

2. Ask your surgeon to lend (or rent?) you a Roll-A-Bout.

You put your knee on this sort of modified skateboard with brakes and wheel around when you need one free arm (not so easy with crutches).

3. Get dressed every day.

Even if wonderful friends and relations have taken over the driving/cooking/and other items on the endless parenting list. It just feels better, even if it takes a few hours to get pants over your cast.

So, here's the writing topic.

Make a list of three tips:

• three tips for surviving divorce
• three tips for shovelling your driveway (don't use a leafblower on snow, for example)
• three tips for avoiding writing
• three tips for feeding a picky eater.

After you have your list, take it from there. You know how it goes: don't think, just keep the pen moving. You can do this: write for 7 minutes. That's all. It takes longer for me to get a sock on my left foot.

Come write, one and all! It can be a New Year's Revolution: write every day. Welcome back!

Lost

Hello all! I will get to comments later, but I don't want to delay the new writing practice topic, which came out of this week's in-person Just Write workshop:

Here's your writing practice topic for this week!

Read the writing practice guidelines. Stretch your fingers. Start with this sentence (fill in the blank):

Yesterday, she lost her __________ (mind, toothbrush, virginity, camera, best friend...)

Write for 8 minutes.

Thanks to all who've posted -- some exciting stuff!

On a side note, I visited a Rockaway MOMS Club book group this week and the discussion was fascinating: not all stay-at-home moms empathized more with Thea, the stay-at-home mom in The Other Mother, and not all working moms with Amanda, but the group was split about evenly between empathy for the two. I heard some amazing mom stories, and I hope some of the attendees will find their way to join us here.

Meanwhile, if you have (or know of) a book group that might be interested in The Other Mother, let them know I'm willing to visit in person (if you're geographically close) or via speakerphone--or that I'd be happy to answer questions online. The book really lends itself to discussion. Of course, the first question in Rockaway was about The Kiss.

Happy week, all!

Falling

for all of you and your lovely posts. I promise I'll comment on them later this week, but I have to go to the doctor, and to pick up the dog's ashes (very sad; she was old, but we really, really miss her), so I wanted to post a new topic for all you Write Women.

Fall, adding sweaters, sorting closets, picking apples and peaches, the hay maze.

Here's the writing topic for this week:

First, re-read the rules. Think about one of them for a moment (don't think, use your senses, whichever hits you today).

Then, write about giving something away. (old clothes, a car, a kiss, love, money, a baby...) Write for 9 minutes.

I can't wait to read you!